I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Randomize
