people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize