party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize