party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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