i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
