we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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