I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
