She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize