check it out our google latitudes are spooning
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
