Just fell off a train. Bad.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Randomize
