Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
