i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
