In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm getting married
To pizza
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
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