Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Randomize
