just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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