you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
