How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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