i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
