Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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