I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize