even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
