dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
