I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize