Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize