8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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