Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
