We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
