so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
