We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
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