brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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