if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
