fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
