Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Randomize
