Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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