I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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