I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
