Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
My vagina just recognized that song.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Randomize
