: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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