Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
