Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
