i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
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