i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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