my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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