very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
