I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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