Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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