We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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