I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
i think i have two assholes
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
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