Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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