Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize
