i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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