Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
